Volunteer for my Honors Thesis Project

Please click on this file for the pdf version: Share Your Story

The Benefits of my Project

If you are reading this post, you might be considering participating in my Honors Thesis Creative Project. My thesis is a photography project, in which I photograph individuals who have experienced some form of domestic or relational abuse. The end result is a photographic show at an art gallery at ASU, where I will defend my thesis. I will get many questions that include, “Why did you conduct this project?” My answer will include the following.

I am conducting this project because I believe it has many benefits for the people involved. My immediate goal is to provide an outlet of expression for an individual who has been abused. Photography is a powerful tool that, in my opinion, is a form of therapeutic healing. By photographing individuals who have been abused, I hope to provide healing. Each of the stories that I will photograph has immeasurable power and meaning. The fact that a complete stranger is willing to tell me about their story (and photograph it) is simply amazing. This says a lot about human nature: that we want to be heard. The purpose of my project is to allow these individuals to be heard, understood, and cared for, while shining a light on the impacts of abuse.

If you are interested in learning more about my project, please contact me at hschiavo@asu.edu.

Important Resources

I highly encourage anybody who has experienced trauma to contact EMPACT (http://www.lafronteraarizona.com/index.php?option=com_wrapper&view=wrapper&Itemid=94). EMPACT is a facility that provides counseling and important skills to individuals who have had trauma or have suicidal tendencies. If you qualify for their therapy, their services are entirely free (which is incredibly generous and amazing). You can also call 480-921-1006.

Please call (480) 784-1500, the Arizona Crisis Hotline, if you ever need an immediate person to talk to.

Again, those Resources are:

AZ Crises Hotline: 480) 784-1500

EMPACT: 480-921-1006

ASU Counseling Services: 480.965.6146

Megan’s Story

“What do I want to tell the world about abuse?

My Hideout

Contemplation

Comforts

Scarred

Safeplace

Faith

I want to tell the world that there are so many people out there who don’t realize that YOU DESERVE BETTER. Even though my experience, if told in a certain way, could come across as a parent reasonably disciplining a child… when there’s that gut reaction that something’s not right, when you start to believe and feel that you’re worthless, you’re stupid, you’re x, y, and z… No matter who it is that’s making you believe that, even if you yourself are starting to believe it and you think it’s just you… YOU DESERVE BETTER THAN THAT. And even more than just that, YOU CAN OVERCOME IT.

To be abused by your father, this role model in your life, someone who is supposed to love you and support you in a positive way is no small matter, no matter if he tells you that it’s out of love, or it’s for your own good, or that there’s no other way your stubborn ass will get what he’s trying to teach you. If you’re hurting on the inside in a way that is not constructive to you, if you’re hurting on the inside in a way you feel is irreparable… it’s not right. There’s such a thing as psychological abuse, emotional abuse. The person abusing you might not even realize that he is and simply think he’s doing what’s best for you. People can live in their own delusions; sometimes, you become part of it.

But what’s so beautiful is that you ARE strong enough to live through it. You ARE strong enough to stand up and fight it. You have this great beauty within you that no one can take away, no matter how hard you’re made to believe it isn’t there or that you’ve “f*cked it up” beyond repair. No matter what you’re told, no matter how many times it’s tried to be beaten out of you, the one thing that no person can ever take away from you is that internal beauty. What is that? Well, it’s different for everyone; for me, I find myself as beautiful through the way I can love other people so deeply and compassionately; I find my beauty through the songs I write and the music I play; I find my beauty in the way that I can bring a ray of happiness into other people’s lives. YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL and worth so much more than the scars left on your skin or your heart or your soul or your mind. YOU ARE MORE THAN JUST SCAR TISSUE.”

-Megan

Meet A Girl

“What do I want the world to know about abuse …my story?

I want to let everyone know that is or have been in an abusive relationship that you won’t forget the things that you have been through but it will get easier to deal with. Just don’t shut the people around you out, let them in. I think that these song lyrics are perfect.

Paramore; Last Hope

And the salt in my wounds isn’t burning any more than it used to

It’s not that I don’t feel the pain

It’s just I’m not afraid of hurting anymore.

And the blood in these veins isn’t pumping any less than it ever has

And that’s the hope I have

The only thing I know is keeping me alive.”

-A Girl Whose Story Will Make a Difference

Meet Alison and Livvy

“What would I tell the world about abuse?

Alison

Coping

Comforts

Love

Mother and Daughter

Memory

I would tell the world that it’s not too late to get yourself out and start over. I know how hard it is to walk away, it’s terrifying. I know how it feels to want to go back to your abuser because it’s easier, and maybe this time, he really will change. So you give chance after chance, hoping for it to change. It won’t. The change has to come from within you. You have to dig down, past the hurt, past the pain and self-hatred, and find the tiny part inside of you that still thinks you’re worth something. Find that part and use it to get yourself out. KNOW your self-worth. KNOW that you’re strong, confident, beautiful, amazing, smart, ambitious, courageous, and so many more things. Know that you don’t have to live your life with abuse. It’s not too late to get out and start again, don’t wait around, don’t delay. You never know what your abuser is capable of, you never know if this might be the time he really goes off the deep end. I would tell them it’s okay to ask for help, it doesn’t make you weak. It’s not too late, you CAN change your life, you CAN start over. Don’t wait!!!!!!”

-Alison

The Affect We Have On Others

Most often, we have a cloudy perception of our ability to influence others. We may be aware of our power to impact a person, but unaware of the extent to which we are capable. This effect may be good or bad, but for the purpose of maintaining a positive attitude, I want to focus on the good. I’ll start with the story of Alison.

Recently, I have received two separate emails from two individuals that I have photographed for my current photography project. The first woman, Alison, volunteered for my project because of her previous experiences in abusive, romantic relationships. Her story is powerful because of the strength, courage, and determination that this young woman has obtained after years of abuse. Alison is a symbol of power and overcoming struggle. As I have become acquainted with her, she has earned a large amount of my respect. For this reason, I was beyond honored when she had told me this:

“Thank you for photographing my family and for allowing me to be a part of your amazing project. I told my sister about it and your project has opened the doors of communication between us. We never talked much before about that stuff, but now I have a new closeness with my sister, and I have you to thank for that.”

I cannot fully explain the effect that her email has had on me. Simply, it is an amazing feeling to know that I am capable of impacting others in ways that I could not have originally imagined. This is an experience that I hope all people can fully understand.

In an email from another participant, I read about the young lady’s previous experiences. She told me that I was one of the few people that she had ever told. I will not go into details about her account, but I want to share the overwhelming gratitude I felt when this young woman trusted me with such personal information. It is beyond humbling, and it makes you realize that we are capable of making a huge impact in the lives of others. I feel honored that she told me about her personal story, because it makes me know that she trusts me and that she is on her way to healing from her past. To understand this is beyond magnificent.

Go out today and give somebody an enormous smile, because I guarantee that smile has a greater impact than you could ever imagine.

The Power of Self-Mastery

In two weeks, I will be embarking on a summer-long journey as a camp counselor at an amazing children’s over-night camp. This is my second summer there, and I thank God that I have a little more knowledge this time around.  During this time of preparation, I have been thinking a lot about what it means to be a camp counselor. Last year, I remember becoming the mother to fifty-six children for two months. It was an emotionally challenging journey, to say the least, but also a life-changing one. I loved our campers as if they were my own, I finally understood what it meant to be self-less, and I learned how to make light of any difficult situation. It was “the hardest job I will ever love,” and I could not be more thankful and honored to work at camp again.

As I reflect on last year’s summer, I have been putting together a list of positive characteristics that I want to polish up this summer. I want to master the art of self control, to be become truly selfless and patient, to love everyone unconditionally, to be encouraging and positive, to enforce love and unity within my unit, to promote feminine dignity and self-respect, and to master my own emotions by remaining calm and forgiving quickly. To sum it up, I want to become a true woman; a true woman of God.

I have asked myself, “How can I master myself when I am trying to master fifty-six hyperactive monkeys constantly running around?” Well, I will definitely experience stress, anger, frustration, sadness, and other roller-coaster-type emotions, but it is up to me to decide how I will react in these situations. It might be hard to vanquish some unwanted emotions, but I know it is possible with faith and God’s helping hand. Even though, I will not have much time to pray and go to church, a wise priest told me that our actions can be as powerful as prayer. So, each day, I am going to react to every situation in Godly patience, love, and respect. I can become a woman through my actions and God’s grace.

What’s the point of me sharing my goals for this summer? It is definitely not to make you feel like you need to start believing in God or become a “Godly man or woman.” Not at all. I just want my audience to strive for positivity, self-mastery, respect, and love in all of their actions. I want to encourage positivity, the ability to think wisely before we act, and the desire to serve our community by humbly loving one another. If we could all perform these simple actions and emotional choices, our world could be such a wonderful place.

[The last photograph was not taken by me.]

Combining your Dreams into One Possible Reality

A few days ago, I made a post about how I came to discover my calling as a child psychotherapist. Recently, my dreams have developed into something greater and I will illustrate how I will make them come true. This semester I have been taking a course entitled, “Professional Practices for Artists.” I have learned more valuable life-lessons in this course than in any other course throughout my life. I have learned how to be confident in myself, how to be professional, how to market my artwork and human rights philosophies, and best of all, I have discovered my true God-given career path.

In the past week I came to a huge epiphany. I realized that my two career paths (art and science) do not have to be mutually exclusive. I also realized that my incredible passion for horses does not have to be separate from my career goals. In one class period, my dreams evolved from just counseling into Equine Therapy.

Words cannot explain how perfect this career path is for me. It combines my incredible passion for helping children, my desire to become a therapist, and my desire to be around horses for the rest of my life. Not only that, but it will also provide me with a major outlet to get amazing fine art images. Best of all, this business will allow me to impact my community in a positive way. It is literally the perfect plan for my life.

So, what is the next step? Baby steps. It will be a huge task to start my own therapy practice, but I know I can do it. I was born to do it; it is my calling. My first step is to create a 30+ page professional business plan. This document will help me to articulate my thoughts, solve all of the nitty-gritty details, and have a more developed understanding about how to start my own business. I will learn about the competing companies in the areas surrounding my business, my target market, how I will earn funds and finance the property, and every other detail you can think of. Down the road, I’ll have to go to graduate school for counseling. All the while, I will be gaining new skills to ensure the success of my future equine therapy practice. Eventually, you can find me on a beautiful plot of land in Colorado with my fifteen horses taking children with high emotional needs on a fun, therapeutic trail ride.

“You just Know’

When you have discovered the perfect career path, you become so excited that you just want to scream in  joy.  God has done it again. He has shown you how perfect His plans are and you become speechless. Your friend asks you, “How do you know you’ve found your calling.” You answer, “You just know.”

Throughout the three years that I have been in college, God has slowly but surely hinted to me about my future. In my second year, I had overwhelming feelings that photography was simply not enough for me. So, I pursued the Walter Cronkite School of Journalism. After speaking with an adviser, I realized that journalism was not the right fit. God is so good at helping us get to where we need to be; sometimes we need to set foot in the wrong direction to fully understand what is right.

[This image was not photographed by me.]

This first failed attempt did not get me down. I immediately began searching elsewhere and I started to remembered my first bizarre childhood dream: becoming a counselor. When I was little, I loved giving advice to people. My mom and dad started telling me that I was “wise beyond my years” when I was in third grade. Soon after, I dreamed of becoming a counselor to help people to “be happy”. Not the typical childhood dream of becoming a firewomen, doctor, vet, or superhero, right? Yet, my intuition knew that it was right. After over ten years, I have been reminded of my first childhood dream. So, last year, I finally knew that I also needed to pursue Family and Human Development. I instantly felt fulfilled with amazing staff, classes with meaningful content, and I could not asking for anything else. When you find your calling, you just know that it is God’s perfect plan for you and nothing can stop you from pursuing it.

My brother is one of those beautiful souls who pursued his childhood dream of becoming a fireman. I am so proud of him and we all “just know” that it is the perfect fit for him.